Knapps relational model describes the different stages that one may experience while in a relationship. This can look very different depending on the type of relationship you are in, whether that be formal or casual. Additionally, someone may not enter all the stages and could skip certain stages depending on how they feel. I think in many cases, since we as humans are constantly entering new relationships, this happens to be the case. After reading about this model, there is one relationship that I have had in my life that pretty much went through all of the stages which I think is pretty cool to reflect on.
This person entered my life when I first got to college. She was very spontaneous and fun, which aligned with my personality, so I got a good first impression. We also happened to live together in a dorm suite together so we spent a lot of time together and got to the bonding stage pretty quickly. I won't get into too much detail, but some things started happened that sort of rubbed me the wrong way. It was never one big event that happened that caused us to start the differentiation stage, but rather a combination of things that led me to realize we had very different priorities and values in life. After progressively growing a part for months, we ended up avoiding each other quite a bit and after I moved away, I would say our friendship is pretty much terminated since we no longer keep in touch.
After reflecting on this experience, I think it is so interesting that our relationship progressed through all the stages in such a short amount of time. Since it was so short, I feel like I can almost recall the moments in which our relationship began to transition. One stage that I would like to focus on however, is the initiating and experimenting phase. These early phases, in my opinion, are ones that are most likley to be affected by online communication. Although, me and this person I spoke about were roommates, she had initially reached out over social media to talk before we all moved in together. Additionally, our first moments in the next phase or experimenting were also mostly online. After adding each other on different social media platforms, we would frequently send each other funny videos which helped us find some common ground. Coming from a small town, it was not common that the first encounter I had with a friend was not face to face.
In our reading about perception, self, and communication, it states "Perception is a factor that increases the complexity of communication" (Pearson et al., 2021, p. 30). With this, I think our perception of another person in these initial phases of Knapps model can greatly affect the outcome of a relationship. Having my first few encounters with this person online made it hard to tell her personality further than what we spoke about over text. Perhaps, if I had these encounters face to face, my perception would be different which would affect the level to which we bonded so quickly.
References
Pearson, J. C., Nelson, P. E., Titsworth, S., & Hosek, A. M. (2021). Human communication (7th ed.). Mcgraw-Hill Education.